Quotes by Loki Laufeyson (Earth-616)
- I have done your bidding, All-Mother. May I present, rescued from cold eons locked in lonely bondage... Gram. Sword of Sigurd, the first of our great heroes -- and a fitting weapon for... Loki, agent of Asgard. So. What's next?
- In Midgard-speak, she's a bad mama jama. Now where is that bacon I ordered...?
- They call themselves Avengers. But I'm not sure they even comprehend the meaning of that word. What do they have to avenge? Have they been scorned and rejected their entire life, even by those they call family? Have they been hunted and hounded to the ends of the earth and beyond? No. That's just me. I'm the only one who ever does any actual avenging around here. There wouldn't even be an Avengers if it weren't for me. You might even go so far as to say... that Loki is the greatest Avenger who ever lived.
- Luckily for you, it's quite difficult to murder a sorcerer of my caliber... not that there are any other sorcerers of my caliber, mind you... even by throwing said sorcerer into the sun. You naughty star-spangled boy you.
- Listen to me, you flag-draped imbecile! Can you even understand what this means? You were a grand mistake, Captain America! All of you were! You were never supposed to be here!
- "Stupid machine..." Why, these are the very rifles that Skurge the Mighty Executioner wielded in his final stand against the --
- Now, before you do anything rash, consider that most of the interesting life in the universe is created by accident, and you just created an entirely new universe. Plus, being a god? Not so bad.
- I've done it! I've gotten the power I always craved! Odin's throne!! I was born to possess it! It must be mine forever! I'll never give this up! NEVER!
- Strong as you both are, your strength is nothing to mine! Evil as you both are, your evilness is nothing to mine! For I am -- Loki!! I am half-brother to Thor himself!!
- I, who was born the son of a King -- I, whose father was slain by the hand of Odin -- I was meant to rule!! All the powers of evil' are at my command! I have but to use them wisely, and they shall bring me triumph!!
- It is done! The trap is set! Once again, the Destroyer shall roam the Earth - guided by the brain of a hapless, evil human! The Destroyer -- he who has the power to destroy the Thunder God himself!
- Among my enemies, Ularic, there is a saying - "When the voice of Loki is still, look to your weapons - for surely there is menace in the air!"
- And now, by my cunning wit, I am at last free! Free to cause mischief -- to create discord -- and to seek revenge against the one responsible for my capture -- Thor, the Thunder God!
- So that is his secret! He's the all-powerful God of Thunder, only while he holds the hammer! Once the mallet is out of his hands, he becomes an ordinary mortal!
- Everything is happening as I desired! Now, I have Thor at my mercy... on my home ground... with no magic hammer to help him! Verily, Thor has come home to perish!
- I am the echo of a scream. I am the magpie who whispers. I am the crime that will not be forgiven. And this is my story...
- We're all going to change again. That's just life. I can't be this Loki forever. You can't be that Verity forever. Five years, ten years, we'll both be different people... there's still that gravity. What people expect. But birds feel gravity, too. And acrobats, and dangers. And they dive and swoop and tumble anyway. Loop the loop, walk the wire... do tricks. Nah. No more evil. Mischief, now. That's still got legs.
- Because I'm putting together a crew. For a caper to make your casino heist look like... well, like a bad speed dating night.
- And... knowing is half the battle?
- You ask me why I did what I did? Ask, rather, why the serpent Nidhogg eats the roots of Yggdrasil -- why, when the tree's death means, in turn, the dragon's ruin? Because, Thor, I keep telling you -- that is what it was born to do -- that is what I was born to do.
- You are as beautiful as the goddess Sif -- and as resourceful... but your Ragnarok is now.
- Hid it -- no seed -- no war -- no death -- I don't even know where it is -- saved you, Thor -- I saved everybody -- even though they all hate me. They told me I was going to save you, Thor! They told -- it doesn't matter. You're just like the rest. It doesn't matter what I do.
- You there, gimp. A witch struck me with lightning and fire in the desert and his name shook loose in my head. I remember Thor, do you?
- I'm not the same frightened child you used to swat aside like a fly. I am the Loki who just slaughtered your greatest warriors with nothing but words. So tell me, father... are you going to continue wasting both our time with your trivial little tests... or would you like to see what a Loki can do to a Thor?
- An all-new, all-different Thor deserves an all-new, all different Loki. Hello. That's me.
- It's no lie when I tell you that Asgardia will fall today. And no one, no god in all the heavens, can do anything to change that. Not the All-Father. Not the Odinson. Not you. There are some things... you just can't save. Goodbye, Lady Freyja.
- Really? Because from the winning side, brother... things look just about perfect.
- No... you may try. You have no idea what I am... no one does.
- The superhuman Civil War. Do you know how it started? There was an incident. An inciting incident. It could have happened anywhere to anyone, but it happened at a school. Children died. Then lines were drawn.
- I am Loki!! The evil Thor has put me in chains as you can see! I need your help, mortal one!
- I merely gave a bit of advice, Thunder God, to an astute Argive prince I did happen to meet... a man after mine own heart, by name Odysseus. We call that which we did jointly create -- the wooden horse!
- Even when thou hadst thy power -- the strength of Loki was almost equal to thine own! And now -- since thou art god no more -- thou canst only be called -- MY VICTIM!
- None may say what Loki can do! None may dare tell Loki nay! For Loki doth wear -- THE RING IMPERIAL!!
- Now, with thy spell, I bid thee mold a form. For, Loki would create -- a man. And he shall have power such as none have ever known. Power enow to crush the life from Thor. Strong let him stand -- and ever proud. For he shall serve the lordly Loki.
- The lightning hath stolen the light from my eyes -- all is in darkness -- all is night! Midnight evermore!
- Ah, Thor. You've always been such a fool. This was a test, brother -- like that neanderthal I created -- I have learned what I needed to know. And for the moment -- I am DONE!
- Why be thou so surprised, God of Thunder? Surely thou didst expect as much! After all, who better to sit the throne of immortal Asgard in the untimely absence of omnipotent Odin and thee, than thine own most able brother... LOKI!!
- Methinks the lovely Karnilla hath at last discovered thy secret, my friend -- and it hath rendered her impotent against thee, as I had planned! After all, how can she unleash her arcane powers against the one man in all the universe she professes to love? How can the Norn Queen do anything, when the spirit that possessed the body of the Destroyer is the spirit of... Balder the Brave!
- By Hela! The cursed Thunder God did touch the Destroyer before me! 'Tis his noble spirit which now animates the armored one -- and the Destroyer is sworn to slay whomever he first sets his hooded eyes upon!
- Ofttimes hath it been said that "Ragnarok is coming" -- and the nightmare ne'er hath come true. But this time, fear not -- RAGNAROK DOTH COME!! The Twilight of the Gods -- the end of all that is!
- I began this campaign thinking Odin had betrayed his wife Frigga for the love of Queen Jolena. But I was wrong about my father -- and I stand now ready to pay my penance. Mischief is one thing, Tyr -- and a thing I revel in... but I have renounced sheer, naked evil! And yours has gone too far!
- An excellent jest. Well worth the price of a stiff neck for a day or so. After all, the first thing a sorcerer of quality learns is to make himself as difficult to kill as possible! Ah, Balder, they name is laughter!
- Welcome, accursed brother! Welcome to Midgard! Welcome to Buzzard Gulch! Death rides for thee!
- None other than Loki should have sat upon the golden throne of Odin. Henceforth shall the golden throne be empty and death hold dominion over all the kingdom of the gods! Fly! fly, you demons! and let the last days of Asgard begin!
- Now, he will spend the rest of eternity trying to destroy that which cannot be slain! Enjoy yourself, brother! Perhaps I shall return in a few hundred years to see how the two of you are getting on!
- Your attempts to exterminate all life have been quite amusing... up to a point! Unfortunately, that point has been passed! Go home, Seth! Leave Asgard at once, or I shall become... annoyed... very annoyed!
- I am a friend... a friend who can help you gain your revenge on Thor and every other misguided fool who has ever thwarted you! All it will take is a simple act... an act of vengeance!
- No longer do I acknowledge the rule of Asgard! Greetings, dear brother... I fear you have made a most fatal blunder! Surrender your almighty HAMMER or the boy DIES!!
- Either you will kill the man within -- or you shall stand and bear witness -- while I lay waste a city -- and decimate its population! Which will it be, Thunderer? The choice -- is YOURS!
- Why, my brother, is it not clear? Are we not celebrating Balder's heritage? And should not all of Asgard join with us in celebration -- at the coronation of a new Prince of Asgard?
- Time is elusive, lovely Hela. And it's rules may be bent but not broken. I cannot go back and change what has happened. But I can make what happened, happen. And spend the rest of my very long life wondering which came first. But ultimately... caring not a whit.
- I take great comfort in your words -- but though you are right that I know you well, I fear you have mistaken me for another -- my brother.
- Lightning. Darkness. The one can never be the equal of the other. In the end, the darkness must always -- overwhelm and hurl back the light.
- Actually, that was me. Hey Ratatoskr. I'm cosplaying as "Cat Thor," and that hammer was... "Mewnir"?
- Right? This is why you get a genderfluid demigod to be your fashion designer: I know what works.
- Stories. It's God of stories now. This -- is a &*%$# story.
- I brought you Wiccan and let you sink your spell's teeth into him. Thankfully, you not blabbing about it was [part of the deal]. Ah, magical deals. The best of all deals. For me, any way.
- We need to make the power Billy has more powerful so he can wrest it free. He needs to become the Demiurge. Now.
- I'm not the murderer Loki. I'm the murder weapon Loki. I'm a copy the old Loki made to lie in wait for his innocent self. I'm not the murderer. I'm just identical to him. I had no choice. End it. Before I can talk my way out of this.
- I'm in a different role now. I have to play the part I wrote myself into. I killed an innocent boy, who was myself. I've done worse, though less existentially traumatic. Armies have died for me, in my old life. Whole worlds burned... and I always had someone else to blame. I can't avoid being Loki.
- Conversations about saliva are hence out of bounds until I have breakfast before me! Can't this spaceship go any faster? Breakfast! Give me breakfast! The Norse God of Mischief craves the congress of breakfast meat!
Conversations with Loki Laufeyson (Earth-616)
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